Saturday, May 16, 2009

Good Jokes

Here are some good ones I picked off the web :
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HOW JEWS GOT TEN COMMANDMENTS


God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better."

The Arabs asked, " What are Commandments? Can you give us an example?"

God said, " For example ............ . Thou shall not kill."

The Arabs were shocked, "What? Not kill? No way! Killing and massacaring innocent people is our birth-right and the only reason for our existence.. No, we are not interested. "

So God went to the Africans and said, " I have Commandments. "

The Africans wanted an example.

God said, "For example ........... Honor thy Father and Mother."

The Africans were dismayed. They said, " Father? Yo maan! Can't tell for sure who our fathers are, maan!"

So God went to the Mexicans and said, "I have Commandments. "

The Mexicans wanted an example.

God said, " For example ........... Thou shall not steal."

The Mexicans were flabbergasted. They said, " No steal? No steal?? Hey Senor, we no steal then how we live, huh? Gracias, but no! "

So God went to the French and said, "I have Commandments. "

The French wanted an example.

God said, "For example ............ . Thou shall not commit adultery."

The French were stunned. They said, "What? Not commit ze adultery ....... ? Non, non, non. Non Monsieur. Pardonnez nous. We, ze French, must have ze romance. "

So God went to the Jews and said, "I have Commandments. "

The Jews asked, "Commandments? How much do they cost?"

God replied, "Nothing. They are free."

The Jews answered, "Good. We shall take Ten! "

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In the city of New York, a pet but vicious Rottweiler dog attacks small child. A brave soul pounces on the Rottweiler and saves the child. Soon the media and the Press are at the site and are busy interviewing this brave lad.

“See the newspaper tomorrow“ says a Press Reporter. “You will see yourself in the headlines as The Brave New Yorker saves a child from a vicious dog”

“But” says our young man “I am not a New Yorker”

“Don’t worry “ says another Press Reporter “But you will be in tomorrow’s headlines as The American saves a child from a vicious dog”

“But” says our young man “I am not an American, I am a Pakistani”

The headlines next day read

The Vicious Pakistani Attacks A Pet Dog

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